I sit here..

....in the room that will be Peter's when we bring him home.  It's currently my schoolroom.

I love this room.  My favourite part of the day is always going up there after everyone has gone to bed, and preparing our work for the next day.  It's quiet.  It's peaceful.  It's just a very calming room.

We bought his crib.  It's still in the box, and it will be stored in that box in the closet, just to my left.  We have the bedding, the decorations, and a few toys.   I'd packed them away after baby #3 outgrew them, "just in case" we'd need them again.  I even have some clothes that might be able to stock his dresser, depending on when we get to bring him home.  I went through them today, as a matter of fact.  (Not on purpose, really, but because it was a "deep clean" kind of day and ALL of the boys had their closets sorted through.  Clothes that were too small were packed away, bigger clothes pulled out of the storage bins....and to get to all of those, I had to first get past all of the smaller sizes, most likely one of which Peter will be able to fit into when he comes home). 

It's a quiet excitement that hums in this room now, along with the peacefulness.   

This is a big, busy weekend for us in the adoption process.  We'll be finishing up our home study visits, and all that will be left will be waiting for the state of Arizona to sign off on everything.  I'm nervous about getting through to the other side of this weekend - once we're there, I have to wait patiently for someone else to finish their part of the process.  Once we're there, I have to release what little sense of control I have over bringing Peter home.  Once we're there...all I can do is sit and wait.

I think I'll sit in this room when the weekend is over.  I can wait here, picturing how it will look for Peter when he first comes home. 


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